Anger: “It Injures Me”

Anger is an all-too-familiar “gateway” feeling that can lead to more destructive behaviors. What does God’s Word tell us about managing this feeling?

Those of us who enjoy a little classic soul and funk from time to time may be familiar with a Marvin Gaye song simply called “Anger.” In this song, the artist relates the harm caused by anger and rage. In one section, the artist sings that he doesn’t want to be mad at anybody and that anger hurts him—“up and down my spine … in my brain … it injures me.”

Anger, gone unchecked, can truly injure us; whether by destroying our closest relationships or shutting doors that may have been left open if not for rage. God makes this known many times throughout the Bible, but nowhere more than in the Proverbs. In this book, several traits of anger and wrath are demonstrated, as well as the consequences.

Three destructive aspects of anger highlighted in the Bible include how it is impulsive, how it can escalate and how it can be passed on to others.  

Anger is impulsive—be slow to wrath (James 1:19)

An old remedy for anger is to take deep breaths and count to 10. This remedy was developed because it is common knowledge that anger often rises quickly to the boiling point. We are offended by something or harmed by someone, and we immediately want to avenge ourselves. We read something on the Internet, and we immediately want to write that person and give him or her a piece of our mind.

Ponder how many relationships may have been saved if we had just waited, thought about it and followed the idiom “sleep on it.”

Proverbs 14:29 tells us, “He who is slow to wrath has great understanding, but he who is impulsive exalts folly.” This would be a good scripture to read before pressing the send button or before giving that guy or gal “what for.”

Anger can escalate into violence or resentment—don’t let the sun go down on your wrath (Ephesians 4:26)

Anger can build for years and years and finally explode into domestic abuse or even murder. It can also quickly escalate into a brawl or a shouting match that leaves both sides with a mind-set of “I am right, and they are wrong, and nothing will ever change my mind about that.”

Proverbs 17:14 states, “The beginning of strife is like releasing water; therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts.” Our anger must be stopped before it turns into something more destructive.

Anger is a communicable threat—bad company corrupts good habits (1 Corinthians 15:33)

Arguments usually don’t start with both people shouting. Someone who is not in control of his or her anger (usually the one who starts raising his or her voice and cutting people off) can spread that anger to others. One person angry about a situation usually is overjoyed when more and more join his or her side.

Proverbs 22:24-25 relates, “Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man do not go, lest you learn his ways and set a snare for your soul.” Hopefully the next time we are swept away in someone’s anger, we can read this scripture and ask, “Why am I really angry?”

Having righteous indignation (or being angry without sin) differs from the anger mentioned above in that it is compatible with the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23—love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control). This is anger we feel for God’s sake and glory.

How often can we truly say that the anger we feel is for God’s glory? If it is impulsively out of control, escalating into resentment or hatred, or negatively affecting others around us, we must conclude that it is not righteous indignation. Therefore it must be changed.

Thankfully, God helps us do this by giving us His Word of truth and example. Even Marvin Gaye in his song recognized the incredible example we are to follow—the example of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

For more about managing anger and other emotions, see "What's Your Emotional Intelligence?"

Eddie Foster, a school speech-language pathologist, and his wife are members in the Cincinnati/Dayton, Ohio, congregation of the Church of God, a Worldwide Association.