How Is Technology Affecting Families?

Think quickly—how many times did you use technology today? We are surrounded by a myriad of electronics that are intended to make our lives easier or more interesting. How are our gadgets affecting our family relationships?

The Barna Group recently released a new study that is summarized in their article “How Technology Is Influencing Families.” We have all heard reports that the quality time between family members has diminished in recent times. So is the digital age helping or hurting our parent-child relationships?

This study involved parents and 11- to 17-year-olds who live in the same household.

Findings

• Parents are very nearly as dependent on electronics as their children.
• More family members feel electronics have a positive influence on their relationships than those who think they have a negative influence. For example, families use some technology (television, movies and video games) as a shared experience.
• Few family members take breaks from their electronics.
• Conflict about technology is not what one might expect. Only about a quarter of those surveyed stated their families experience “strong disagreements about the limits on media and technology” on a weekly basis. About half of parents were worried about whether their children’s time spent on technology was beneficial. One fifth of the teens and tweens say their parents have a double standard in regard to technology, and almost as many say their parents bring work home too often.

Questions

Given the major inroads technology has made into family life, many parents and religious leaders might have expected the results of the survey to be more negative. Still, there are a number of questions raised by the findings.

Are families in control of their technology, or are their lives being controlled by it? Barna’s findings seem to confirm that whatever patterns are already in place in the family are simply magnified by technology’s use. So, if a family already had a good communication pattern in place, technology helped. If the family did not have healthy interactions, then the members were further alienated.

Have some parents abdicated the role of guarding their children from negative media? Are arguments avoided because clear and consistent guidelines are in place, or because the parents have given up? If parents have a double standard, how can they truly teach responsible use of media and technology?

Probably most of us realize that technology, just like any man-made invention, can be used for good or evil. So what is God’s perspective on technology? You might say modern technology is not mentioned in the Bible, but are there principles that will guide us toward using technology in a godly way?

Families, technology and time use

One of the major issues with technology and families is time use. When you boil it down, we are all endowed with exactly the same amount of time each day. All people down through the ages have had similar demands on their time—time that must be spent on things we do to survive (sleep, work, eat, etc.) and time that is left to our own personal choice. So, given those things that are real necessities in our lives, what do we do with the rest of our time—our discretionary time?

As Christians, we know that we answer to our Creator for our every thought, word and deed. “Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is man’s all. For God will bring every work into judgment, including every secret thing, whether good or evil” (Ecclesiastes 12:13-14).

Ecclesiastes tells us there is a time and season for every purpose under heaven. When you look at Solomon’s list in chapter 3, you see that the entire gamut of one’s life is covered.

Labor is mentioned in 23 places in Ecclesiastes. In 10 of those places man’s labor is mentioned in conjunction with enjoying the fruits of all our labor. So God wants us to work and enjoy the fruits of that labor.

In the first chapter of Ecclesiastes, Solomon says there is nothing new under the sun. Really? What about all the latest gadgets? Solomon might say, no matter what the technology, the essential themes and choices of life remain eerily the same.

In the second chapter of Ecclesiastes he tells us of all his pursuits during his life. Some of these verses could aptly describe Facebook, Farmville, Cityville, Mafia Wars, Words with Friends and a plethora of other cyber activities that occupy our time.

In chapter 4 we pick up on the idea that being a hermit is not profitable and being social (connecting with others) is beneficial. So is our use of technology alienating us from others or enhancing our social network (which should include God)? Does it lead to vanity or building righteous character? Where is our focus? What is our goal?

Read more of Ecclesiastes and you will find it is amazingly up-to-date in dealing with the challenges of our postmodern world. And check out Larry Greider’s Teen Blog, “Be a Doer.” God doesn’t want us to miss out on the really good stuff!

There is much more to this subject. Feel free to share your ideas and suggestions about technology and parenting on our Facebook.com/cogwa page.

Susan Scott Smith is a third grade teacher and a member of the Church of God, a Worldwide Association, in Texas. She remembers when the Princess telephone came out, then the IBM Mag Card, then the Internet—and then when the snowball effect took over!