She Reaches Out Her Hands

This experience with a homeless woman has touched my life deeply.

About 10 years ago, on the streets of Sacramento, California, a rather dowdy lady timidly approached me and softly entreated, “Excuse me, do you have any money or food? I’m so hungry. I won’t spend money on drugs or alcohol, I promise!”

She looked desperate—homeless and hungry, having obviously lost her way in life. Glad to help in the small way I could, I gave her some money and something to eat. She sincerely thanked me, promising again she wouldn’t spend it on anything inappropriate. I told her it was her money now, and I wouldn’t tell her how to spend it, but I hoped she’d use it for something good for herself. She just stood there, though, looking at me, seeming to need something more.

Christ’s example of compassion

Maybe it was coincidence, but I had just been reading about the deep compassion of Jesus Christ. The story of how He displayed that love through touching a leper was particularly striking to me. Touching such a diseased person was taboo, and seemingly unnecessary in the healing of this man, but “Jesus, moved with compassion, stretched out His hand and touched him” (Mark 1:41, emphasis added). His spontaneous touch was an act of pure love and compassion.

With that in the back of my mind and seeing how she was lingering for some reason, I suddenly found myself giving her a big hug! This surprised both of us, but she melted into it, and then said something I’ll never forget. In tears she mumbled that she couldn’t remember the last time anyone had hugged her or touched her kindly. It was a deeply shocking and sad statement. She then left, smiling broadly, filled in ways money or food could never provide.

The importance of touch

Many times I’ve thought of her and other lonely people and how incredibly important it is to physically reach out to others. We probably all know people who spend most of their time alone. Their only possibility of being touched by another human being is when they go out into their communities and churches, or when/if someone visits them—and sometimes even then it doesn’t happen.

Now I don’t believe that in this day and age we should just go up to random people and hug them, but through that chance street encounter I learned the importance of looking around and responding to those who need the thoughtful touch of another caring human.

God has given women in particular a gift, and responsibility, for the care and nurture of those around us—parents, siblings, husbands, children, friends, neighbors or maybe even someone we’ve just met in a store or on a walk. Our responsibilities for care and nurture cover multiple roles, and among those is a powerful and simple act of service—touch.

Proverbs 31:20 speaks of the woman who “reaches out her hands to the needy.” Sometimes the most powerful way we can reach out is to literally reach out—through a hug, a pat, a soft squeeze on the arm, a warm handshake—and touch those who need it.

That event taught me the importance of being sensitive and making others aware of those who need the loving nurture of a caring touch. Touch can make the difference between loneliness and inclusion, between desperation and hope, between sadness and joy. Touch is a vital key for our psychological health and well-being. It would be great if we could each make it our personal goal to search for those who are rarely touched and, with love and following Christ’s example, “reach out our hands” warmly to those who need it so much.

Someday, another hug

I didn’t see this woman again until nearly a year later. As I went out for lunch one day I spotted her lying on a bench across the street from my workplace. She didn’t respond to my efforts to wake her, and a nearby shop owner called the police. Later, I found out she had died on that bench.

I hope to see her in a happier time, give her another realllly big hug and let her know how our meeting changed my life and opened my eyes for the better. I can’t wait for her to realize she will never have to suffer hunger and loneliness again and will live a life of hope, joy, love … and compassionate touch!

Dee and her husband, Clyde, have two children, four grandchildren and a large extended family. She loves to study godly women’s roles, hanging out with her family, humor and puns, reading, gardening, fishing and making sock puppets with those grandkids!