Weddings, Wives and Crowns

The royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton and my brother’s wedding share a common thread: the potential for an excellent wife to be her husband’s crown.

Earlier this year, I had the pleasure of being in my brother’s wedding. This recent event was an incredibly rewarding experience for several reasons. First, I had the sincere honor of standing as a bridesmaid in my only sibling’s wedding, which was a particularly special experience for me because of the incredible closeness I feel toward my brother, a closeness that very much resembles that of a lifelong friend.

This day was also incredibly special because I walked away from it with a sister. She is my sister-in-law, but I wholeheartedly claim her as my sister.

Wedding planning challenges

As is usually the case with weddings, the months leading up to the big day were very stressful, but also very exciting. One of the problems that Preston and Emily faced (and one of the best problems to face, in my opinion), was that of having more close friends and family that they wanted to invite than they had room for at the ceremony and reception.

Preston and Emily, through their volunteer work with the Church and their travels, have met and become close to many people, making them a pretty popular duo here in Texas. Although a wonderful and flattering fact, this proved to be a challenge as many curious and excited loved ones watched them plan their big day.

A royal wedding

So, seeing how Preston and Emily graciously handled the volume of attention and regard surrounding their wedding, I can only imagine how important such graciousness would be for Prince William and Kate Middleton as they make the final plans for their big day.

Kate, as the one who is entering the royal family through the marriage, has undergone some intensive instruction about her role and responsibilities in the family so that she makes a smooth and hopefully incident-free transition into her role. The mere fact that she’s becoming a wife has its implications concerning grace and responsibilities, but considering that she is marrying royalty, it becomes especially important for her to have these qualities because of her public exposure. The pressure is on, and will stay on, for Kate Middleton as she prepares to become Mrs. Prince William.

“An excellent wife is the crown …”

When I think about the pressures of planning a wedding and the responsibilities of being a wife, I am reminded of one of my favorite scriptures in Proverbs: “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4).

What is this scripture really saying? How does this scripture apply to Kate, Emily and other wives and fiancées?

“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband.” What is the role of a crown? The crown is the iconic symbol of a king, worn on a king’s head to clearly establish his role to those around him. A crown is typically adorned ornately with precious metals and jewels, the value of which epitomizes the honor of one’s role as king.

So, when I think about what a crown indicates, I personally feel overwhelmed by the incredible opportunity current and future wives have. An excellent wife is a symbol of respect for a husband in the same way that a crown is a symbol of respect for a king. An excellent wife has unprecedented value. An excellent wife can be clearly recognized as an important reflection of her husband. The idea that women, through their diligence to be excellent wives, can function as figurative crowns for their husbands evokes a powerful image.

Once the function of a crown is clear, it’s easy to understand why our role as wives is so important and must be approached with respect and humility. Excellent wives are not available in droves. Excellent wives are shaped with great care and consideration.

Every time I dwell on this scripture, I am overcome with an incredible sense of empowerment but also a strong sense of responsibility. I see that once I take on the role of wife, I will have a fantastic opportunity to function as the crown upon my husband’s head. But at the same time, I understand that to be that crown, to be the excellent wife, I must take that responsibility seriously so that I might bring honor and not shame to my future husband.

Ellen Buchanan is a member of the Houston North congregation of the Church of God, a Worldwide Association, and is currently studying accounting at Houston Baptist University. She loves playing sports and creative writing.