Real Men Learn to Focus

One of the keys to proper masculinity is focus. Real men must reclaim that mission-driven mentality that epitomizes masculinity and fuels accomplishment.

Buck up.

Power through.

Buckle down.

Be a man.

These phrases are cornerstones in the self-driven man. They elicit within us that surge of testosterone, that injection of blood diesel that fuels us.

We. Get. Things. Done.

The sense of duty and honor strikes us not as a catchphrase, but as the tenets that uphold the definition of manhood. To suppress this take-charge mentality is to suppress the very strength God gave men.

Manliness is much more than watching football and going camping. The chest-thumping, guttural chanting of “I am Man” simply vanishes as hollow words dissipating into empty air if proclaimed from someone without direction, without focus.

Focus should be a characteristic of real men. In other words, men should have a goal-oriented nature. We fix cars. We build cabinets. We climb company ladders and spend long hours perfecting corporate presentations.

Men find more than satisfaction in their accomplishments. Men find fulfillment by bringing tasks to completion. This fulfillment, however, requires the ability to focus on the task at hand. This ability to focus seems to have atrophied in our modern, fast-paced lifestyle. To feel fulfilled as men, we must strengthen our ability to focus.

The importance of building focus

It is difficult to focus in the world we live in. Consider:

• The movies we watch change camera angles approximately every 10 seconds.
• We demand quick answers from our Internet search engines.
• We look to the next interesting thing, often supplanting what interested us one year, month or week ago.

Without focus, the ability to complete tasks, projects or hobbies wilts. We must ensure that we maintain, and in fact build, our ability to focus on a goal until it is accomplished. Only then are we able to experience the satisfaction of completing it.

“Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might” (Ecclesiastes 9:10). As men, this verse should thump in our chest with every beat of our heart, until it beats its last.

Focus on these examples

As a starting point, consider developing focus in these three areas:

Fixing the house: This applies specifically if you’re a homeowner, but the principle can apply to many areas of life.

Our house should be functional and safe. Maintaining a functional and safe house also demonstrates care for our wife and children. We should want to shelter, protect and provide for them. For the men with the financial resources, paying someone to fix the house may be a smarter use of time and resources. If this is the case, ensure that the house gets fixed in a timely manner. Focusing on our home’s upkeep helps prevent the house from becoming neglected. Real men don’t neglect their homes or their families.

Listen to your wife: The modern stereotypical male is a husband who has no problem ignoring his wife while she talks to him (think Al Bundy or Homer Simpson). This stereotype is completely unacceptable. Real men determine not to be that man. A man without the basic decency to listen and focus on his wife is not a real man at all.

Focus. Turn off the distractions. Do what it takes to listen. Some people find it helpful to actively participate in the dialogue to keep focused. For example, during a conversation about an upcoming dinner party (power through it—you’re a man), if you have to ask questions to keep focused and attentive—then do it.

Read the Bible: Some men struggle with focusing while reading the Bible. Writing out scriptures as you read can help you stay focused. Some still daydream while doing this, so instead they read a passage and then write down points of application. This forces them to focus on the material at hand. Some men read scriptures out loud. Regardless of the approach, effectively focusing on the Bible aligns your thinking with God’s thinking.

Stay focused!

Without focus, we will not finish what we start. Losing focus results in unfinished or abandoned projects, draining money and resources. We then miss out on feeling fulfilled with our accomplishments. All too easily we replace the satisfaction found in the completion of tasks with the fleeting excitement of the next interesting thing.

It’s time to complete what we start.

It’s time to focus.

It’s time to be a man.

For more information on true masculinity, read:

• 3 Characteristics That Define a Real Man.
• Jesus Christ: The True Model for Manhood.